faith marriage family homemaking finances homeschool health hobbies & crafts holidays

HOME

START HERE / ABOUT

FREE PRINTABLES

FAVORITE RESOURCES

Search This Site

Follow by Email

Sign Up

Don't worry, we hate spam too, and promise to keep your email private!

Online Health Consultations

Mr. Visionary

God is a Visionary as seen in his person, the Holy Spirit. He made some men in the image of that part of his nature. Prophets, be they true or false, are usually of this type . Some of you are married to men who are shakers, changers, and dreamers. These men get the entire family upset about peripheral issues, such as: do we believe in Christmas? Should we use state marriage licenses? Should a Christian opt out of the Social Security system? The issues may be serious and worthy of one’s commitment, but, in varying degrees, these men have tunnel vision, tenaciously focusing on single issues. They will easily pick up and relocate without any idea of what they are going to do for a living at their new location. They are often the church splitters and the ones who demand doctrinal purity and proper dress and conduct. Like a prophet, they call people to task for their inconsistencies . If they are not wise, they can be real fools who push their agendas, forcing others to go their way. One Visionary will campaign for the legalization of pot, while another will be an activist to make abortions illegal. Most will just sit around the house and complain, but in their souls they are Visionaries.

Learn how to be flexible, and learn how to always be loyal to your man.

Visionaries are often gifted men or inventors, and I am sure it was men of this caliber who conquered the Wild West, though they would not have been the farmers who settled it. Today, Visionary men are street preachers, political activists, organizers and instigators of any front-line social issue. They love confrontation, and hate the status quo. “Why leave it the way it is when you can change it?” They are the men who keep the rest of the world from getting stagnant or dull. The Visionary is consumed with a need to communicate with his words, music, writing, voice, art, or actions. He is the “voice crying out in the wilderness” striving to change the way humanity is behaving or thinking. Good intentions don’t always keep Visionaries from causing great harm. They can stir up pudding and end up with toxic waste, if they are not wise. An unwise wife can add to the poison with negative words, or she can, with simple words of caution, bring attention to the goodness of the pudding and the wisdom in leaving it alone. Every Mr. Visionary needs a good, wise, prudent, stable wife who has a positive outlook on life.

If you are married to one of these fellows, expect to be rich or poor, rarely middle class. He may invest everything in a chance and lose it all or make a fortune, but he will not do well working 8 to 5 in the same place for thirty years, and then retiring to live the good life. If he works a regular job , he may either not show up half the time or he will work like a maniac 80 hours a week and love every minute. He may purchase an alligator farm in Florida or a ski resort in Colorado, or he may buy an old house trailer for $ 150 with hopes of fixing it up and selling it for $ 10,000, only to find out that it is so deteriorated that it can’t be moved. He will then have his wife and all the kids help him tear the top off and carry the scraps to the dump , (saving the appliances in the already crowded garage), so he can make a farm trailer out of the axles. Now that he has a farm trailer and no animals, expect him to get a deal on three, old, sick cows, and… He may never be rich in money, but he will be rich in experience.

Greatness is a state of soul, not certain accomplishments.

The wife of Mr. Visionary should be just a little bit reckless and blind in one eye if she is going to enjoy the ride. If this is your man, you need to learn two very important things (beyond how to make an appeal).

Learn how to be flexible, and learn how to always be loyal to your man. You will be amazed at how much happier you will be and how much fun life can be if you learn to just go with the flow— his flow. Life will become an adventure. You will actually begin to feel sorry for the gals married to the stick-in-the-mud, steady type. And once you get it into your head that your husband does not have to be “right” for you to follow him, you will FINALLY be able to say “bye-bye” to your overwrought parents, even when they are screaming that you are married to a crazy man . People looking on will marvel that you are able to love and appreciate your husband, but you will know better because you will see his greatness.

Greatness is a state of soul, not certain accomplishments. Thomas Edison, though not recognized as such, was great after his 999th failure to make a light bulb. The Wright brothers were great when they neglected their lucrative occupation of fixing bicycles and “wasted time” trying to make one of them fly. If the light bulb had never worked and the plane had never flown, and no one remembered their names today, they would have been the same men, and their lives would have still been just as full and their days just as challenging. Did Edison’s wife think him great when he used his last dime on another failed idea? If she didn’t, just think what she missed.

The Visionary man needs his woman’s support, and he will appreciate it when it is freely given. Without her, he feels alone. This guy will be a little hard to live with at first. Big, wild fights are the usual beginnings if a nice, normal girl (who had a Mr. Steady daddy) marries one of “the weird ones .” They will either have a bitter divorce (she divorces him) in the first few years, or she will decide to learn to appreciate him, because he is really rather lovable. I get very few letters from wives married to these high-strung, going-to-reinvent-the-wheel men. I do get lots of letters from their mothers-in-law, asking us to write and straighten out their sons-in-law.

Some of these guys talk with glowing enthusiasm and animation. Usually, they enjoy hashing over ideas, plans and dreams. If you are married to one, he loves to tell you about his newest idea, and he wants your enthusiastic support, not a critique of his idea. He will look at his idea more critically later, but for the moment, the idea itself is invigorating to him. He will have a thousand ideas for every project he attempts, and he will try many that he will never finish, and he will finish some that are worthless, and you “knew it all along.” Remind him of that the next time he has an idea, and you will destroy your marriage— but you won’t change him. He will share his “dumb ideas” with someone else.

It will be your face he looks into to see the marvel of what a great thing he has done.

Learn to Enjoy the Trip

Several years back, a newlywed couple decided to take a bicycle road trip for their honeymoon. They had the map all worked out and the bikes and camping gear ready. After riding for a couple days, the young wife noticed that her good husband was going the wrong way. She stopped him and tried to show him on the map that he had veered off the course. She had always been endowed with a natural ability to read maps and knew exactly where they were. He was not so gifted and argued that she was dead wrong and insisted that they were headed the right way. Later that day, when he did discover that he had indeed taken the wrong road, he brushed it off and blamed the signs or gave some plausible reason. Again he took the wrong road , and she argued with him. He kept correcting their course, but they were not getting anywhere by its shortest route. She let him know his error . That part of the honeymoon was not very “honeyed.” Nothing would change his mind. He knew he was right, and if not exactly right, then he was as right as could be expected under the circumstances, and criticism was not welcomed.

What could she do? The young wife was not pleased with the way they were relating, and she reasoned to herself that this could become the pattern for the rest of their lives. As she brooded on the matter, it occurred to her that it was very important to him to be right and to be in charge , and it really didn’t matter which road they took. They were taking this trip to be together, not to get somewhere in particular. God in his mercy and grace gave this sweet young wife a new heart. She decided to follow her husband down any road he chose, without question or second-guessing. So she cheerfully began to enjoy the beautiful day and the glory of being young and in love as she continued to pedal her bike down a road that was taking them to where every marriage ought to go, even though it was not according to the map.

This little lady is married to a 100% Visionary Man. She started her marriage right, following him wherever he led, regardless of whether she thought it was the right direction or not. She has been flexible and is enjoying her ride. Someday, when her husband is assured that he can trust her with his heart, he will let her be his navigator— and still take the credit for it. The moral to this story is: the way you think determines how you will feel, and how you feel influences the way you will act.

He spends his life looking through a telescope or microscope, and he will be

stunned that what he sees, others do not seem to notice or care about.

If you are married to the Visionary Man, learn to enjoy the trip, for if he ever does make a better light bulb, he will want you to be the one who turns it on for the first time in public. It will be your face he looks into to see the marvel of what a great thing he has done. You are his most important fan. When you know your man really needs you, you can be happy with just about anything.

Overtime, this type of man will become more practical. If you are a young wife married to a man whom your mama thinks is totally crazy— then you may be married to Mr. Visionary. Right now, purpose in your heart to be loyal to him, and to be flexible; then, let your dreamer dream. Lean back and enjoy the ride; it should prove interesting.

The world needs the Visionary Man, for he is the one who seeks out hypocrisy and injustice and slays the dragons. He calls himself and those around him to a higher standard. He knows how to do nearly everything and is readily willing to advise others. In time, he will be quite accomplished in more than one thing.

The moral to this story is: the way you think determines how you will feel, and how you feel influences the way you will act.

* Visionary Man will take the trash out if he remembers it. But, he may also end up inventing a way whereby the trash takes itself out or is turned into an energy source, or he may just waste a lot of time building a cart for you to take it out. He will not mind cleaning up if he notices it needs doing, but he may get so deeply involved that he decides to paint while he is sweeping, and then switch projects before he gets finished painting. And he will likely be irritated when his wife nags him about it.

* Visionary Man will talk and talk and talk to his honey if she approves of him. He will be subjective, thinking about feelings, moods, and spiritual insights. One of his greatest needs will be for his wife to think objectively (proven truth) and use common sense, which will help keep his feet from flying too far from solid ground. He spends his life looking through a telescope or microscope, and he will be stunned that what he sees (or thinks he sees), others do not seem to notice or care about. Every small issue will become mind-consuming, and he will need his wife to casually talk about the big picture and the possible end results of relationships, finances, or health if he continues to totally focus on his present interest. His sweetheart needs to stay in a positive state of mind, yet never jump into his make-believe world, trying to be too much of a cheerleader on dead-end issues. Let him burn out on things that are not wise. But don’t throw water on his fire. Let him find his own balance through bumping into hard realities. The Old Testament prophets of God must surely have been the Visionary types. Remember Elijah, Jeremiah, and Ezekiel and all their trials?

* Visionary Man is an initiator and provoker. He is a point man, trailblazer, and a voice to get things done. He will start and keep the party going until the Command Man gets there to lead on.

* Visionary Man’s focus is so intense that matters can easily be blown out of proportion. A wife must guard against negative conversation about people. An idle conversation by her can bring about the end of a life-long friendship. This is true with all men, but especially so with Mr. Visionary. Search your heart and discover your motive in what you say about people. What is your intent when you speak? To build him up and give him joy, or to build up yourself and make him think that you alone are perfect? If you mention people and make them look a little bad and yourself a little “taken for granted,” your husband may get the idea that friends and family are treating you unfairly, and he may become withdrawn and suspicious. You could unwittingly render your husband unteachable. If you want your husband to grow into a confident, outgoing man of God, then he needs to have a clear conscience toward his friends and family. God says a woman’s conversation can win her lost husband. In the same vein, a woman’s idle, negative conversation can cripple a strong man and cause him to become an angry, confrontational, divisive man. “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear” (1 Peter 3: 1-2).

* Mr. Visionary needs a lady who does not take offense easily. She needs to be tough. He needs his lady to be full of life and joy. A Visionary Man is not equipped to be a comforter— for himself or anyone else. His lady will need to learn to tuck in that quivering lip, square those shoulders, and put on that smile.

* Mr. Visionary can be a leader, but because he has tunnel vision his leadership will have a more narrow focus.

He is like deep, deep water. The very depth makes the movement almost imperceptible.

The wife of Mr. Visionary can ruin her marriage by failing to follow, believe, and participate as an enthusiast in her husband’s dreams and visions.

The wife of Mr. Visionary can heal her marriage by laying aside her own dreams and aspirations and embracing her role as help meet to her man, believing in him and being willing to follow him with joyful participation in the path he has chosen.